1/20/09: So This Is Christmas...

...and what have you done?

"The Church of Liberalism, in the Name of the Father,
the Son, and Barack Obama"

I have always had a wistful feeling about the first two lines of John Lennon's song quoted there. I live, eat and breathe politics; my year is four times as long as a calender. As this is inauguration day, I don't know what to say.

I managed to catch the beginning of the inauguration, but I couldn't watch the entire thing because I had important preoccupations -- like, say, work -- that thwarted the rest of those plans. It's fine, though, because I would only have gotten more frustrated.

This is supposed to be a joyful day like any inauguration day, not just because of who is leaving or coming in to office. I only find myself angry as the futility of it all.

Today someone wished me, "Have A Superfluous Day!!" because they know that I enjoy linguistics and wordplay. Well, I sure as hell did have a superfluous day, even more so than my regular schedule... Really, that's what it is all about: Posers.

People naturally want to be accepted, be part of a group. Humans are social animals. It ticks me off. One of my favorite quotes -- it is actually kind of ironic if you think about it -- is here, by Oscar Wilde:

“Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.” -Oscar Wilde

It is the truest words to have ever been spoken. I doubt many of you are as cynical as I am -- maybe you, Abby -- but I'll try and paint it like I see it.

It is cool to vote for Obama, hence, he won, much like Hollister and Abercrombie & Fitch have done so well in the clothing sector. It is cool for teenagers, college kids, and young adults to wear this brand-name designer clothes so they do well. Simple economics, right?

Anyone remember when Gap was the latest thing? They've since been beat down into a regular clothing brand where they once were the premier style. How about artists like Britney Spears and Eminem? They were both very popular when Bush first took office, in the early 2000s, but they're never played on the radio anymore. Fashion and music trends come and go.

Heck, if everyone else votes for Obama, it must be right! Since the inventions of mothers and bridges, mothers have been telling their children, "If your friends jumped off a bridge, would you do it?"

The logical answer to that is, "Depends if there's a polling station at the bottom."

In Georgia, Saxby Chambliss (R) was running against two other oppontents -- Democratic and Libertarian -- for a hotly contested Senatorial seat. According to their silly rules down there, if no one captures more than 50% of the vote, they have to have a runoff election. I think Chambliss got something like 48%, the Democrat got 44% and the Liberatiran the remaining 4%.

They had the runoff between Chambliss and the Democrat with Chambliss winning handily. Naturally, the voter turnout was depressed because it was just a random election for only that position, but something interesting happened: blacks, who voted Democratic, had a turnout that was next to nothing. Why? Since they were no longer coming out to vote for their man, Obama, they didn't vote in the runoff.

I didn't see statistics, but I'm more than willing to bet that Democratic turnout was down over a larger percentage than the Republican since, A) Obama had already been elected, B) Republicans were fighting against a 60-seat majority. I know that most people only really care about the presidential race, but really, if I haven't illustrated my point...

Anyway, I started this last night (Inauguration Night) and didn't have the opportunity to finish it, so here I'll continue along the same topic but with a day behind me.

I seem to alternate between two viewpoints. The first is the angry partisan that I turn into every time a significant political event rolls around, and the second is the conservative who tries to voice what's best for the country.

See, watching the Inauguration I'll admit the I was angry with what was going on. Now that Obama is no longer President-Elect, I accept and respect him as my president. Look, I don't care if you dislike the man, but you have to have respect for the office, and he's currently sitting in the chair.

I'm happy now that Obama is locked in as president that he is, indeed, President. I truly believe that while he may turn out to be incompetent, bumbling, or inconclusive, he really wants what is best for the country. The difference between him and I is what, exactly, that is and how to go about getting "the best." Though we're still grumbling about some of the stuff that Clinton did, the country is still more or less in line. I've come to be convinced that no single president can do too much irreversible damage to the office or country.

I'll still make fun of Obama, chastise him when he screws up, berate him when he acts like a pansy-lib, and criticize any missteps, but I still respect him. Even in the dark days of 2006 when the tide turned against Bush, I still respected him. I am disgraced when I hear songs like Pink's "Dear Mr. President" or see ads for the show "Lil Bush." (Watch entire thing.)

Look, those bumper stickers that say "I'll Give Your President The Same Respect You Gave Mine"? They're witty, but don't put them on your car. They make you as bad as them... and that's bad.

THE SECOND AMENDMENT

“A well-crafted pepperoni pizza, being necessary to the preservation of a diverse menu, the right of the people to keep and cook tomatoes, shall not be infringed.” I would ask you to try to argue that this statement says that only pepperoni pizzas can keep and cook tomatoes, and only well-crafted ones at that. This is basically what the so-called states rights people argue with respect to the well-regulated militia, vs. the right to keep and bear arms." – Bruce Tiemann

THANKSGIVING CYBER BALL

Come one, come all, to Ze Baron's Thanksgiving Ball!

While I believe this is our very first Thanksgiving Ball, let's not forget all our many previous balls, including the first of them all, the Venetian Carnivale at 360! We also had a wonderful historical characters ball, where I dressed as Richard Nixon. There were really just far too many to mention.

Anyway, let us begin!

To start, we have Tammy's (rk2this) venison roast with veggies:

Following that is her oh-so-scrumptious cherry pie:

Finally we have some Indian pudding. Thanks, Tam!

Mommadish brings us this amazingly dressed deer, straight from the woods!
It makes me salivate just looking at the picture.

From angelsong we have these delicious treats, including an entire Thanksgiving meal!



A nicely roasted turkey



and some savory wine. Thanks angelsong!



She also brought la pièce de résistance to replace the one that went conspicuously missing after one of our previous parties...

A NEW CHOCOLATE FOUNTAIN

If that's not the coolest thing ever, well, I don't know what is. This fountain happens to be the biggest one everly ever, so there should be plenty of room should some miscreants decide to go skinny dipping... or chunky dunking!

This is literally the biggest fountain ever. You can read more about it if you want, but they say a picture is worth a thousand words. How many is a video worth?

Anyway, with that, let's get this party started! For your music consideration, please open then minimize this song as we begin the party!

Please be sure to introduce yourself. I am of the English, though not a Pilgrim. I am King James I, the monarch who reigned when the Pilgrims departed in search of a better life.

VETERN'S DAY: Bivouac of the Dead

This is one of my favorite poems... I discovered it at the Gettysburg cemetery

The muffled drum's sad roll has beat
The soldier's last tattoo;
No more on Life's parade shall meet
That brave and fallen few.
On fame's eternal camping ground
Their silent tents to spread,
And glory guards, with solemn round
The bivouac of the dead.

No rumor of the foe's advance
Now swells upon the wind;
Nor troubled thought at midnight haunts
Of loved ones left behind;
No vision of the morrow's strife
The warrior's dreams alarms;
No braying horn or screaming fife
At dawn shall call to arms.

Their shriveled swords are red with rust,
Their plumed heads are bowed,
Their haughty banner, trailed in dust,
Is now their martial shroud.
And plenteous funeral tears have washed
The red stains from each brow,
And the proud forms, by battle gashed
Are free from anguish now.

The neighing troop, the flashing blade,
The bugle's stirring blast,
The charge, the dreadful cannonade,
The din and shout, are past;
Nor war's wild note, nor glory's peal
Shall thrill with fierce delight
Those breasts that nevermore may feel
The rapture of the fight.

Like the fierce Northern hurricane
That sweeps the great plateau,
Flushed with triumph, yet to gain,
Come down the serried foe,
Who heard the thunder of the fray
Break o'er the field beneath,
Knew the watchword of the day
Was "Victory or death!"

Long had the doubtful conflict raged
O'er all that stricken plain,
For never fiercer fight had waged
The vengeful blood of Spain;
And still the storm of battle blew,
Still swelled the glory tide;
Not long, our stout old Chieftain knew,
Such odds his strength could bide.

Twas in that hour his stern command
Called to a martyr's grave
The flower of his beloved land,
The nation's flag to save.
By rivers of their father's gore
His first-born laurels grew,
And well he deemed the sons would pour
Their lives for glory too.

For many a mother's breath has swept
O'er Angostura's plain --
And long the pitying sky has wept
Above its moldered slain.
The raven's scream, or eagle's flight,
Or shepherd's pensive lay,
Alone awakes each sullen height
That frowned o'er that dread fray.

Sons of the Dark and Bloody Ground
Ye must not slumber there,
Where stranger steps and tongues resound
Along the heedless air.
Your own proud land's heroic soil
Shall be your fitter grave;
She claims from war his richest spoil --
The ashes of her brave.

Thus 'neath their parent turf they rest,
Far from the gory field,
Borne to a Spartan mother's breast
On many a bloody shield;
The sunshine of their native sky
Smiles sadly on them here,
And kindred eyes and hearts watch by
The heroes sepulcher.

Rest on embalmed and sainted dead!
Dear as the blood ye gave;
No impious footstep here shall tread
The herbage of your grave;
Nor shall your glory be forgot
While Fame her record keeps,
For honor points the hallowed spot
Where valor proudly sleeps.

Yon marble minstrel's voiceless stone
In deathless song shall tell,
When many a vanquished ago has flown,
The story how ye fell;
Nor wreck, nor change, nor winter's blight,
Nor time's remorseless doom,
Can dim one ray of glory's light
That gilds your deathless tomb.

-Ze Baron

A VISUAL ANATOMY OF ELECTION DAY

"What Went Down"In my last blog, I gave you droplets of thought and a torrent of opinion. "The Autopsy of an Election" was really just meant to be the final nail in this two-year coffin. For those of you who aren't really interested in that whole reading thing, here's a visual summarization of what went down this election day.





Of course, we've all seen this map outlining Obama's victory over McCain. Really, though, from that map, a quick glance would lead us to believe that it was almost 50/50. Due to the electoral college and how that is set up, a different picture is painted...




This is a map of the United States that has been warped to display national population density by state, essentially reflecting how the electoral votes are distributed. Really, it is unfair to give Wyoming the same amount of electoral votes as Connecticut when, on this map, CT is about 3X larger than the state with the larger land area, WY. Note that the blue (Democrat) states that went for Obama are massively huge while the red states, with the exception of Texas, Georgia, and some other states in the Bible belt, are quite a bit smaller. This is how McCain won so many states but ended with so few electoral votes.




This map shows each state by electoral votes. Notice the similarity to the above map of national population density.Though it is difficult to note the difference, open two instances of Firefox, one on each map, and click back and forth rapidly to see the disparity.



This map is my favorite of them all. It shows the voting map broken down by county. I have enlarged it so that you can pick out your own county, unless you are surrounded by similar-voting counties. Note how Ohio and Indiana are primarily red. Pennsylvania and Virginia, two other swing states that McCain had to win (but didn't) are almost entirely red except for their major metro areas, Philadelphia and Washington DC. This is because in these four states, the minority counties that swung Democrat carried a huge proportion of the population.



Though this map is of no use to the casual observer, let me explain. It shows the national electoral map distributed by country, then warped according to each county's population. Note that the east and west coasts, along with a belt extending from Pennsylvania to Illinois, the Senator's home state, are almost entirely blue.




This map is by far the most telling. Again, it shows counties, but this time they are colored on a scale from red to blue based on the actual vote, not electoral vote or who won in the end. Note that large swaths of the poorly populated areas in the midwest are the most purely red. This carries little significance, though, when you factor in how few people these actually are. The majority of areas that Obama won, on the contrary, are bluish-purple. There are very few mostly blue areas. Note the bottom edge of Texas, which McCain won, is almost perfect blue. This is undoubtedly due to the large Hispanic immigrant populations along the border.

Sante Fe, NM, is by far the brightest area of blue on the map. Again, this could be marked up to a large immigrant population. I can't place the shining blue county in what looks to be right on the southern border of South Dakota. It's placed rather oddly. Further, note the corridor of blue along the lower edge of of the Mississippi River, which Gov. Huckabee referred to as the "Delta" on Fox this morning. There is also a rightward streak extending from this delta to Atlanta. Even Illinois and the markedly liberal New England is purple with some red inroads.




This map better than any other shows us how President-elect Obama captured the high office. This is the scaled map above adjusted to show a population cardogram, like earlier maps. There are nine giant bright blue blobs throughout the map with only small fiery red inroads. The major urban areas successfully captured the electoral votes of those states, and thus, the Presidency for Barack Obama.

-Ze Baron

THE AUTOPSY OF AN ELECTION

Americans all have the right to vote, even if they vote wrong. Though I was confident in a Republican victory in 2008, it was not to be.

November 4, 2008 -- After getting home, I turned on the election coverage. When the first data started coming in, whoo-hoo, McCain's in the lead! Then as liberal New England states started getting called, Obama crept ahead. As the sun started setting on the Midwest, McCain fought back, only to fall short. Karl Rove says he still has a chance, though, but he has to win x out of y swing states, which would be difficult in a regular election.

He and Brit Hume walk over to the giant green screen where Rove consults his notes and starts pointing things out on the green screen. Of course, he can't see what is projected behind him because it is done in the computer, so he's just gesturing at a 'green screen.' He points out that McCain has to win Ohio or else the election is pretty much over... as he says this, I'm thinking, "Why is Ohio blue? It's blue on the map. Does he know that? Why is it blue? Is it is glitch? WHY IS IT BLUE?"

Then Brit Hume puts his hand to his ear, nods, and interrupts Rove: "Karl, I've just been informed that Fox News has called that Obama has won Ohio." Rove looks visibly crestfallen. I get up, take my McCain yard signs out of the window, and sit back down.

At almost 11:00, CNN projects that Obama is the 44th President of the United States. I shut off my television.

November 5, 2008 -- Throughout the day, I was questioned by Republicans and Democrats alike. The only answer I could give was "The country always gets what it wants... not always what is best." More succinctly, "Shit happens." I don't know that truer words have been spoken.

Of course, I was harangued by the occasional Obama supporter throughout the day. At one point, someone mockingly asked me, "So who is the President?" "George W. Bush!" I snapped, leaving them dumbfounded into silence. Another who has been quite the viral Obama supporter pointed his victory out to me, grinning like a Cheshire cat. Here's how the rest of the conversation went, paraphrased for convenience:

Baron: "Yeah, Obama did win last night."
Obama Supporter: "See? I told you so all along."
Baron: "You were right. So, uhh, what city is Barack from again?"
Obama Supporter: "Hmm, umm, I don't really..."
Baron: "That's okay. I can't remember his wife's name, though."
Obama: "Oh, she's... well, it beings with an "M"
Baron: "...and I know they have kids, but how many?"
Obama: "Two! They have two kids."
Baron: "Yes, I'm sure they and their mother, Michelle, will miss Chicago."

Dumbass.

Look, there are intelligent Democrats out there just like there are intelligent Republicans, but let me assure you that this election was not won like the 1992 or 2000 election. Essentially in those instances, politics was removed from society and it was just the informed, educated, and uppity politicos that chose the President.

In this election, Obama did exactly what a Democrat needs to do to win against the Republican machine: inject himself into everyone's lives. He went mainstream. As much as I may sound like a bad McCain ad, he went from being a politician to being a pop culture icon. Which leads me back to my discussion with the Obama supporter:

He won because every idiot with a vote chose him.

I've got to put it blatantly, and frankly I'm sorry if you think this is some bitter partisan rant. This is as objective post-election coverage as you're going to get on the blogosphere.

Obviously this lady didn't know the first thing about Obama outside of the fact that he's "cool" and black, much less any policy positions. This is exactly what Obama needed to do, and he did it. Your or my educated vote is worth just as much as the socialite that gets an Obama button and decides that way. Your or my educated vote is worth just as much as every other American's.

Obama captured about 68% of the youth vote compared to John McCain's 30%. Have you ever wondered how things like Hollister clothing or rap music get popular, then fade off really quickly? It is primarily because easily molded youth are the epitome of herd creatures. Of course, when their favorite music artist writes a song about Obama, it makes it cool to support him. Thus, a trend is born.

I am painting a picture of utter ignorance now, though this was not the deciding factor in the election.

It's the economy, stupid.

Remember way back when this whole election thing started up, just before the 2006 Congressional elections? What was the big issue back then? Do you remember? It was immigration. In fact, one Republican, Tom Tancredo, even tried to run on a platform of securing the border and fixing immigration. While this has always been a personal motive of his, it was a hot-button issue at the time and (falsely) convinced him he had a chance.

Now, in the last month (even two months) of the Presidential election, can you honestly tell me if immigration came up once in a serious manner? I heard it in passing on Fox once and never on CNN. But seriously, in the last two months of election coverage, did you heard the word "Iraq" more than you can count on your fingers? Probably not.

No, this election was hustled by a 52-foot semi barreling out of control with the words "Economy Down" across the side. America got some extreme tunnel vision when the economy started teetering.

Now I'm no economist, but I honestly feel that if Americans need to be told that we're in a recession/depression, then we're not. The only places that the average Joe’s economy is being pinched are some stocks or 401(k)s and things like that. On the larger scale, the only major problems are at the tippy top of the economy where giant companies reside (re: Lehman Bros).

This could translate into bigger problems, especially if these major creditors seize up and it starts to choke off struggling small businesses that are the lifeblood of the economy. Some suggest this could be happening already what with the job losses escalating.

Regardless... Yesterday one of my friends was voicing his opinion on how he thinks single-issue voters, specifically pro-life voters, are casting an uneducated vote. Realize that he's pro-life just like I am, but I can see his point. You have to consider the wider candidate when voting for any single issue: For example, the economy.

The MSM has got the American people so wound up about this impending doom (TIME's recent cover, check it out), a large majority of people think that their personal finances are going to come crashing down around them, even though they are only suspended by thin lines holding back the debt. People think, "If this is going down, Obama will help me out."

Summary: When you want to save business, elect Republicans. When you want to save individuals, elect Democrats. The present problems are currently boiling over only in the business sector, and Obama is going to do slaughter to them. I forsake the days ahead.

As I said above, Democrats are traditionally the ones called in to save the people from the economy, but what is Obama's specific record on the economy? Has he ever actually done anything? Can he point to something he did? A vote here and a vote there don't count, all that is is an opinion rendered.

John McCain was out-campaigned through Obama's injecting himself into pop culture, but the real reason he lost was because Obama inadvertently used the weapon he has been preaching against from day one: Politics of fear. Instead of using a terrorist crisis as basis for radical measures (9/11 → Patriot Act), he successfully positioned himself around this financial crisis as the savoir, winning him the election on people's fears.

Thankfully, there still is hope. The Democrats did not gain nearly as many seats in the House and Senate as they did in 2006, though the predictions were that they would make those same large gains. They only maintain a low majority, allowing Republicans the ability to filibuster (which I look down on) and possibly fight off bills like they did to the bailout bill.

Even so, Nancy Pelosi of the House and Harry Reid of the Senate are extreme liberals, out of the closet and ready to fight. Though this was Obama during the primaries, he mellowed out considerably during the general election. I predict that we're only going to see a traditional Democratic presidency these next four years, something on the lines of a Hillary Clinton/ Ted Kennedy, for he still has a reelection bid to win. Should that happen, though, I fear what he will do.

Hidin' Biden

Remember this quote?

"Mark my words: It will not be six months before the world tests Barack Obama like they did John Kennedy. The world is looking. We're about to elect a brilliant 47-year-old senator President of the United States of America. Watch. We're going to have an international crisis, a generated crisis, to test the mettle of this guy."

It was not twenty-four hours before a generated crisis tested this president-elect. Let's see... Kennedy was tested with the Cuban missile crisis, where Russia put missiles near the United States. On November 5th, Russia announced plans to put missiles aimed towards our allies on the Russia-Poland border to balance the power where we are adding a missile-defense shield. How's that for self-fulfilling prophecies?

I'm gonna sound like a latte liberal when I say this, but I'm going to blame this whole thing on George Bush. Though he did the best he could do with the hand dealt to him a little after a year in office, he left the political landscape inhospitable for Republicans in the near future. He really ought to be excommunicated from the GOP. I still like him as a president, but I resent what he has sentenced us to through his own ignorance.

You really have to congratulate McCain on keeping it even with Obama until the end, even surpassing him once or twice in the polls. He had an advantage against generic Republican from the outset because he is a maverick (blech, I will never say that or "bitter" again) and quasi-moderate. Still, the "R" after his name sentenced him to a loss from the outset.

I have a feeling, though, that in a month or two when this economy thing is solved and relegated to the latter pages of the New York Times with immigration and the war, Americans will wake up as if after a great night of sex, roll over, notice the bed is empty, and think... What have we done?

-Ze Baron

A CALL TO ACTION

Friends, please read this.

Though this election is by and far too close to call, with Obama's lead in battleground states closing or being eclipsed, John McCain is already being written off. The world has already crowned Barack Obama their king. Michelle Obama is in the Oval Office measuring for new drapes. Joe Biden is accepting bids on a rail line from the White House to the Naval Observatory (VP residency) so he can stump in 2012 that he still takes the Amtrak to work every day.

This is not to be. Most polls are showing the race within the margin of error, making it almost irresponsible to to call the outcome.

Today, I went to my county Republican HQ for the second time this election season. I picked up a bunch of literature to give to Obama voters in and close to my family, something I've never done before.

I have a favor to ask of you, though, my virtual friends. Let's start a blitz campaign -- change your headshot to the McCain/Palin sign I have in this blog. Everybody. Let's whiteout peoples' friends lists to the point that there are more of these signs than not.

Show your colors!

Ze Baron